It’s true to say that navigating PMDD can be like having an abusive relationship with yourself, so mindset and emotional health strengthening is necessary to ensure you have the best coping strategies in place when shit hits the fan, in turn, the consequences of the fallout will be much less than if you don’t focus on working on this side of things at all. Frankly, that goes for all humans, PMDD or not.
Today is all about that thing that has highly likely ruined one or more situations, things, relationships and much more in your life: ANGER.
I recently asked members of my Mind Over PMDD Facebook group what symptom they would get rid of forever if they could and the biggest vote was anger.
If you spend enough time in other PMDD-related Facebook groups or over on Instagram you’ll see that a common denominator of people’s desperation and pain is anger and rage.
Now, it’s important to know that every emotion has its place, even those that bring out the worst in us and make us feel like awful people, and that includes anger.
It’s a stress response that’s necessary for many situations. It indicates the need to fight if you or those close to you are under threat. It is a natural response that allows us to defend ourselves and is necessary for survival so it’s important to have the ability to feel this when needed. This stress response rushes cortisol and adrenaline through our systems in the same way it would if we were in significant danger.
When we’re under significant stress, trauma sits in our nervous systems and establishes strong neural pathways, our bodies function in survival mode because it assumes it’s under constant threat and needs to be ready for battle.
And one major problem with PMDD is this vicious cycle that can be so hard to untangle; anger and rage create trauma – trauma creates anger and rage – anger and rage put you in survival mode (fight, flight or freeze) and survival mode is the perfect environment for anger and rage to live their best lives.
So it’s apparent why anger can be so significant in a typical PMDD journey from hell, don’t you think?
And it presents differently for different people, and can also present differently in the same person in different situations. Some want to smash the place up, others retreat and hide away with anxiety symptoms, others scream and shout and others have it bubble up inside in silence.
Here are three simple techniques you can start implementing TODAY to help you take more control of anger and rage:
1) Write this down wherever you can to make sure you have reminders everywhere: IT IS PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO BE CALM AND ANGRY/ANXIOUS SIMULTANEOUSLY. The more you can drum this in, the more your brain will strive for calm and peace because it simply can’t be both. When you’re calm, you can get more clarity, and with more clarity, you can face things with much more strength and have more control over your thoughts, behaviours and emotions.
2) Listen to my 10-minute Turnaround audio (download your free copy here) and have it on your phone so you can put it on immediately as soon as the need arises.
3) When was the last time you re-evaluated your life in general ie who you’re hanging around with, how healthy are your boundaries, what are you consuming etc? All these things can contribute to anger, rage and frustration so make sure these things are healthy so you can prevent these horrible feelings in many cases before it takes over.
Is anger a big symptom for you? How have you been dealing with it? I’d love to hear from you so do get in touch and let me know!
Until next time, sending my love
Amy Viola x
Recent Comments